Pre-Departure Nerves

Just a day away from starting my journey to the snowy lands of Russia, and I can’t help but feel nervous…sad even.

I know what a great time I’ll have. I’ll meet new people who are part of a different culture in a different country, half a world away. What an adventure! Don’t worry, I’ll show you pictures and tell you the tales that couldn’t wait until I got home. With luck, you’ll feel like you’re in Saint Petersburg with me.

But, God, I’m terrified. I won’t speak English for 5 MONTHS! To me, an hour of Russian language class is tiring. How will I handle 5 months? Just think of all the words I don’t know: destroy, muster, orangutan. God dammit! I don’t know orangutan. I’m doomed.

Ugh and I have to socialize with people. It’s hard enough in English. Now I have to do it in Russian. Well, actually, that’s not what distresses me most. If I stay shy, maybe I can pull off that mysterious, foreigner look. Let people work for my attention, not the other way around.

No. I’m not worried so much about friends abroad, rather friends here in America. I’ve worked hard to find a great group of friends and maintain a place in their lives. That’s pretty simple when you see your friends every single day and barely spend a second away from them. Now I have to keep a presence while 4,277 miles away with an 8 hour time difference.

Language is one thing. I’ve got a ticket to Petersburg and a home for 5 months. Out of necessity, I’ll learn Russian to its fullest. Or at the very least, I’ll survive. As for friendship, distance can be deadly. Without contact, friends get used to your absence. They learn to live and enjoy themselves

I’m overreacting. Of course. Just send some messages now and then. Easy peasy. Even so, I’m worried that I’ll come home and realize I have no friends to come home to.

Eh. It’ll be fun.


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